When I was a Scout, I loved getting a good laugh out of my troop buddies. Want to know my secret for lightening the mood and getting everyone to crack up? A clean, hilarious Scouting joke, of course!
In this article, I’ll be sharing with you my all-time favorite jokes for Boy Scouts (and BSA Scouts who are girls, too). Feel free to tell these jokes in between any Campfire Skits your troop puts on (link is my favorite skits!) because great jokes are best shared — and these ones are sooo funny! 😉
The Funniest Scouting Jokes Of All Time
Q: Why are Scouts annoying to play video games with?
A: Because they’re so good at camping!
A Boy Scout was walking around a pond when all of a sudden a frog jumped out in front of him and said, “Kiss me and I’ll turn into a beautiful princess!” The boy thought about it for a moment then picked the frog up, put it in his pocket, and continued walking. He heard the frog speak to him from his pocket:
Frog: “Why won’t you kiss me?!”
Boy Scout: “My troop will be much more interested in a talking frog than a princess!”
My car horn wasn’t working, so I took it to a scout.
The scout fixed it and said, “Beep repaired!” 😀
Q: Why is it so easy for a scout to get married?
A: Because they know fifty ways to tie the knot.
A Scout and two other passengers were flying in a small plane at 5000 feet when the pilot came out of the cockpit in a panic.
Pilot: “The plane is going to crash! I’m sorry, but we only have three parachutes. I have four young children, so I’m taking one of the parachutes. Good luck figuring out which of the three of you get the other two parachutes.”
Scout: “You guys go ahead, it will be my Good Turn for the day to sacrifice my life.”
Passenger 1: “Sure, kid. I’m way smarter than anyone, a genius in fact, so the most important thing is that I live.” He straps on and jumps out of the plane.
Passenger 2: “Kid, I’ve lived a full life and you have your whole life before you — so, seriously, you should take the last parachute.”
Scout: “That’s OK, sir, we’ll both be safe: the genius took my backpack!”
Q: What do you call an Eagle Scout fresh off to military boot camp?
A: A bald eagle.
Q: What did the quarterback say to the Scout?
Q: How can you tell when a Scout has earned the Cooking merit badge?
A: He makes good use of his thyme. 😛
Some Boy Scouts from the city went camping. The mosquitoes were so fierce, the boys hid under their blankets to avoid being bitten. Then, one of the Scouts saw some lightning bugs.
“We might as well give up,” he sighed. “They’re coming after us with flashlights!”
Hilarious Jokes For Scoutmasters
Q: How are socks like Scouts?
A: They always come pre-paired.
One of my Boy Scouts asked me, “Sir, is this snake poisonous?”
I said, “No, that snake’s not poisonous at all.”
So the boy picks up the snake which bites him, and the boy starts to spasm and foam at the mouth as the other kids look on in horror.
I continued, “But that snake is venomous. Poison is ingested or absorbed, while venom is injected. Let’s get it right next time, boys.”
Q: Who does a good turn daily and floats in water?
A: A buoy Scout!
Q: What did the Scoutmaster say to a scout who’s nervous about learning to tie a bowline?
A: You have knotting to worry about! 🙂
A new scout lives in an old neighborhood with a 100-year-old oak tree. Every year, all the kids in the neighborhood put their boy/girl scout badges on the tree.
Eventually, the scout wonders why the kids do this. So, they called up their Scoutmaster to ask him, and he said…
“Oh, it’s just a badge oak.”
Q: How many scouts does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: One. But it takes a few days because they only give it a good turn daily.
Bonus Girl Scout Jokes
Q: What is a Filipino person’s favorite girl scout cookie?
A guy stole $600 from Girl Scouts selling cookies outside of a grocery store. They now have to sell eight boxes to make up for the loss.
My dad said he figured out why he couldn’t stop eating Girl Scout cookies
Because he always wants Samoa.
Telling jokes is actually also a great way to build your communication skills and confidence! If you like jokes as much as I do, I’d highly suggest trying to earn your Eagle-required Communication merit badge. It’ll take your joke-telling skills to the next level!
Also, a big shoutout to my troop and these sites for giving me the inspiration behind the hilarious jokes I’ve shared with you:
Hope you enjoyed this article! If you’re a scout, you should also check out my article on the Benefits of Earning Your Eagle Rank. This will help you to stay motivated and involved in your troop! Come back to ScoutSmarts for more Scouting help and, until next time, best of luck on your Scouting journey! 🙂